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Journal

in d.c. (the weebly app is finally working on my ipad!)

8/29/2018

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A city is such a condensed ecosystem. Here I am adapting to a pace and temperament that is SO different from suburban life in NY (let alone the Peruvian rainforest). Because things are more expensive I can’t just simply work a little and then “take it easy.” The city keeps you on your toes.
Also, conversations. Let’s converse about those, starting with a story about one of my first conversations in D.C.
I was in the elevator in my apartment building (back in late May) and a lady gets onboard with her medium size, black and white patched dog. He was a sweety and so was she! The conversation pace was soo fast though! We quickly jump through topics: what I do (the typical D.C. question I’ve learned), the weather, how I’m new in the city, and general elevator talk. So we’re freed from our little moving cell on the first floor and I’m in the middle of a sentence and suddenly this lady reaches her hand out and says: “I’m married by the way.”
:|
I pause for just an instant. I take her hand and say, “Oh and I have a fiancé!” I said this super normal (which in this situation might have been abnormal), and in a kindly manner but her face drops...and I’m like...what have I done?
She says, “Oh, no I’m Mary. My name is MARY.” She waits for an instant to see how I react and I start laughing like crazy, she’s relieved and is like “I get that sometimes” (totally trying to console me) and she also adds “I do have a partner though.” I say that it feels like we’re in a sitcom and that it was something about her pacing that threw me off. Also I’m thinking in my mind that in this climate of the #metoomovement and all sorts of horrendous reports about sexual abuse coming out of doctor’s offices, churches, and the work place that I would have totally respected her “I’m married” boundary drawing.


Yeeeeahhh, that story pretty much summarizes my first month in Washington D.C., that, and the time I called the lady at Subway “Wakanda” instead of Tawanda. But I’ve gotten better! I know pretty much every cashier by first name at the Giant Supermarket (shout out: Mr. Robert, Mr. Terence, Destiny, Brittany, Brittany (#2), Mark, Marcus, and...damn some are on the tip of my toungue...). And I make it a point to people’s names wherever I go, completely disproving the cliche that customer service in D.C. is terrible. You get what you give kids.
Also I’m learning to talk faster again, but also bring people into a chill pace if I’m not ready to give up my vibe.

Cheers to another attempt at getting our little blog going again. I will write a bit more about the PREMED journey I’m on, classes for the Fall just began this past Monday on the 27th.

​-Zain signing out

ps- I ran into “Married” again once this August, we laughed again and I told her she’s my #1 story about my fresh start in DC.

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Letter to papa & Amma 4/20/18 (it explains a lot)

4/20/2018

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It's a privilege to be back

8/28/2017

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dear journal: 

11/15/2016

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Documented online: The final step for Zain's return to academics was made on November 14th, 2016
(on some super duper full moon no less..)
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'we are one' and upcoming move

12/8/2015

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February 2016 marks a big change in our lives: We are moving to Peru for an indefinite period of time. We have chosen to follow our hearts in response to the calling to immerse ourselves in the traditional medicine work of the Amazon Rainforest. We will begin our new journey with a two week fast at a Center for Research on Traditional Medicines, called TAKIWASI
This prestigious center has been bridging 
traditional and western medicine for nearly 40 years now; treating drug addiction through a therapeutic process of integrating spiritual and medical tools to get to the root of the issue, as well as providing a consistent research model to
​"revalue the human and natural resources of Amazonian traditional medicine."After a long interview process through letters and official documents, we are confirmed to partake in DIETA (click to read more). After this we are free to explore the Amazon and its mysteries, with our intuition and prior 3 years of experience guiding us, we feel confident that we will be safe and that we will find the perfect circumstances to support our learning process.  
​
In related news:
We are still working on our album and are aiming to release it within this blessed month of December. 
This sharing of our hearts through music has taken on a new significance as we find ourselves growing nostalgic of even the most routine aspects of our day, with the knowledge that life will soon be looking very different. The spirit of a farewell embeds itself in the music as we record, motivating us to give our best efforts to the process. 

The song "We are One" will not be on our upcoming album, but can be listened to and downloaded for free on soundcloud. Lastly we have compiled videos of memories from our experiences from the past few years and though it is mainly a farewell to our family here in New York, we'd like to share it with everyone who has had an exchange with us in one way or the other. 

Love,
Zain and Zahra
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ta fête

10/15/2015

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"Your Party"

One of the biggest lessons I learn again and again from working with Ayahuasca is not to run from my problems, to walk into what I fear and earn conviction by transforming my fear into strength. 

When I saw this video by Stromae, a French artist, I saw my past enacted in this drama. As a teenager it was overwhelming to realize that my family, my loved ones, my friends besides being my support, also had the capability to be my destruction.
In fact, the whole world is this way- the Earth itself -"she gives us milk and she hunts us."

In my teens I thought that I should put my family...no, my whole life behind me. A new start, a fresh perspective...it sounded so enticing and many people in my age group were in the same thought process, as they were rebelling against the status quo, so I thought I was on the right track. All the ties I was born into, all the love...it started to feel like suffocation. Maybe there were nice people out there, a new family, an enlightened bunch who truly knew how to live and love.

Soon however the "fresh new world" started to look and feel a lot like the maze I thought I left behind. 
-Zain
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Sketching in the jungle

6/21/2015

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Shamoriri...
My vision is to complete this one day as an endless loop of of clouds, snake and curandero coming out of each other. 
-Zain
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On choice and Ayahuasca

6/15/2015

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Ayahuasca doesn’t tell a person what to do or what is necessarily better or worse for them- they decide that. This medicine can be approached as a powerful guide that lays out all the options and has one viscerally experience- activating the limbic system -what each choice would entail. The light and dark, positive and negative, Yin and Yang of both sides is felt. It is then up to the individual to move forward and stick with what is the healthiest choice, based on their capacity to discern what that is, at that moment in time. This step in a healthy direction will further the person’s evolution and they will gain an ever greater capacity to discern goodness, beauty and truth. 

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Sea-Monkey Totem

6/5/2015

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The bear, the eagle, the wolf...all spirit animal totems, all well known and identified with by many. However there is one virtually unknown and quite an unexpected totem: The jolly Sea-Monkey!

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Stream of consciousness 1

5/29/2015

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onward

5/28/2015

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Little glimpses of what is in store
You've been changing
All it takes is heart
Even cliches are rendered anew 
You've signed up for adventure
Now saddle up and ride
The horse is set loose
Capable of thunderous gallops
This beast knows you 
As you know yourself

-Zain
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May 28th, 2015

5/28/2015

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"The heavens descend, and the hells arise,
bubbling like oil and water,
in the cauldron of the mind."
-Zain


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